About the Band

Jason “Smoky” Greenwald (guitar): Smoky was born on a ranch outside of Sacramento to a family of country music singers. Immersed in what he knew as hillbilly music, he realized from an early age that he would be a picker and a grinner. Smoky spent his teenage years trying to promote the use of the sitar in country music, but his vision was never to gain widespread acceptance. Soon after he abandoned this movement, he picked up his cousin’s Telecaster and -- viola! -- his trademark sound was born. Though he dreams of having his own 398-acre tomato farm, Jason still lives in his parents' basement.

Peter “Joaquin” Marietta (bass): Joaquin hates music, and is in this band only for the money. Despite an embarrassing fondness for medical oddities at an early age, he went to law school and defended the estate of Peter Sellers in a landmark case involving smoking jackets. Normally a law-abiding citizen, Joaquin was once stopped for speeding in the Arizona desert on his way to a dwarf-tossing competition. When the officer searched the car, he found Peter's large fez collection in the trunk. Recognizing a fellow Shriner, the trooper let Peter off with just a warning. After this disillusioning bout with the legal system, Peter then threw himself into contact improv dancing, which lowered his chi to the point that playing country music was the only viable option left to him. Squeaky-clean Joaquin's favorite food is chocolate Easter bunnies -- he always eats the eyes out first so they'll quit starin' at him. When not reading the "Red Meat" comic strip, Peter enjoys fez hunting in his spare time. He has never kissed a girl, but not for lack of trying.  

Andrew “Handy Andy" Waegel (pedal steel): Handy Andy was born clinically tone deaf, with no discernable soul or musical aptitude. A true accounting prodigy, he became a CPA at the tender age of 9, which left him completely devoid of emotion by age 11. At age 22, Andy was kidnapped by the Country Music Liberation Army and forced to play the steel guitar as therapy. The pedal steel opened the doors to Andrew’s previously forgotten consciousness. As the Reverend Drew, he went on to found the Church of Bakersfield Twang, where he preaches to his flock every Sunday while accompanying himself on banjo. He has just recently learned how to control his drooling.



Ingrid “Slim” Wynden (drums): While Slim was still in utero, her mother noticed that the kicks from within seemed to follow the beat of whatever music was playing on the radio. In fact, when Ingrid was born, the contractions were in the rhythm of a fox-trot. Slim has been drumming ever since, and has no interests outside of rhythmically based activities. Her main hobby is sitting in her truck and listening to the windshield wipers. Ingrid spent 4 years in prison for assaulting a man who suggested that Phil Rudd isn't a good drummer. In the great tradition of Spinal Tap's drummers, Slim is functionally illiterate. Her best friend is a tattered old cowboy doll named Buck.